Keep dating the wrong men
I truly believe that when it doesn’t work out with someone in the present, it is because it is meant to work out with someone else in the future. If you don’t learn that lesson and evolve, you will only face the same issues with each relationship moving forward.If you want to avoid a lifetime of dating the wrong men, you have to be conscious of the old wounds you need to heal and take action to stop destructive habits and patterns.Wasting months on men who don’t want anything more than a casual relationship.
What you ARE going to do different is to stop ACCEPTING them.
Stop accepting unacceptable treatment and justifying it because you “love” him.
Yes, as a dating coach, I am very fluent in the way you can allow your optimism to override your realism when it comes to love. Loving and losing can hurt far more than never loving at all.
And after all of those false starts and rejections and disappointments, it would be very easy to come to the conclusion that, dammit, you just seem to attract the “wrong” men. What if I told you that in my 15 years of single adulthood, I went out with a lot of women who were, let’s just say…highly emotional. And this is the stuff I can share with you in a blog post! I craved stability and normalcy and unconditional love and support. Thus, the problem isn’t that you’re attracting the wrong men. The truth is that you don’t ATTRACT the wrong men, you ACCEPT the wrong men.
Perhaps you had an unstable male figure in your life as a child, or your first relationship was one that left you hurt and wounded.
It is possible that you are choosing relationships that repeat the unavailability, rejection or abandonment issues that were familiar in your earliest relationship with the opposite sex.
Why do great women pick people who treat them poorly? When you don’t get the love and attention you want, it may seem natural to give more.
Smart, beautiful, incredible individuals – who give 110% to a man who in return, are only half-vested, part-time, and approach the relationship with a “me”, not “we” mentality. You invest more – only to find yourself more disappointed, depleted and feeling insignificant with each attempt to create/repair the connection. Jeremy Nicholson calls the principle of “sunk costs”.
Stop spinning your wheels, waiting by the phone, walking on pins and needles in fear he’ll dump you.